website. Something memorable that roles off the tongue. I’ve given it
some thought, but with limited success. See if you can come up with
anything better (Jeez, it can’t be too hard to beat these). If you come up
with anything, email me, ianhastie@dallassecretwine.com
Just to help you out a little, I started thinking about what we, as a club
(oops, sorry Shane, “Society”), actually do and came up with the
following slogans, which all seem to fit, but just aren’t quite what we
need……….
Dallas Secret Wine Society…… we’re not all alcoholics! (Probably true,
but the advertising standards people may be able to make a case against
us)
Dallas Secret Wine Society…… You Too can be a Sophisticated Drunk.
(Closer, I think. I mean, picture yourself in a bar and there’s a group of
guys there, maybe playing pool, and they’re drinking beer, or maybe
cider, would you look at them and think, “Now there’s a really
sophisticated group”. No. You’d think “Drunks, every last one of them”
and quite frankly, if last Friday is anything to go by, you’d be right. But
picture the same group and each one has a glass of red wine in his hand.
He occasionally swirls it and savors the complex bouquet, turns to his
buddy and mentions cherry or plum. What would you think now? I can
tell you……. You’d think, “I wonder if they’re all gay” No, No, I mean
“Wow, aren’t they sophisticated!”) Hmmm, No. I think I was right the
first time.
Dallas Secret Wine Society…… We drink wine (again, factually correct,
but not very inspiring)
Dallas Secret Wine Society…… We were formed so that Shane could
print his own business cards with “President” on them. (Ahh, now we’re
getting closer to the truth. Have you ever seen Shane at a gathering of
Wine Snobs? At last count, out of all the people in Texas who have ever
had a glass of wine, 87.3% of them have Shane’s business card. Of
course that’s just a rough estimate, but I’m good with numbers. Did you
people even read the last editorial???)
Dallas Secret Wine Society……We spend too much money on wine.
(That one’s for Leslie. Hands up all those spouses who have ever been
surprised to find a case of wine at home, only to be told “Hey, it was a
bargain…. by buying the whole case they only work out at $42.63 a
bottle!”)
Now you may be able to think of a great slogan, but I am coming to the
conclusion that all of the best ones have been stolen by the big
advertising companies, for instance, the Volkswagen slogan “Drivers
wanted” was stolen from a bar on Greenville avenue that advertised
“Drinkers Wanted”, and the Audi slogan, Vorsprung Durch Technik is
actually German for “Pass me another glass of that wonderful Chablis”.
Not many people know that.
Others that have been stolen borrowed include;
“Cabernet, take me away”….borrowed by Calgon
“I’m only here for the Chateau Lafite Rothschild (’66)”….borrowed by
Double Diamond
“A day without Port is like a day without sunshine.”…. borrowed by the
Florida Citrus Commission
“Krug, the best a man can get”…. Borrowed by Gillette
“Can Head & Shoulders stop dandruff? Who cares, I’ll have some more
Merlot”….actually, I think this one was stolen from Head and Shoulders.
“Betcha can’t drink just one (bottle)”….borrowed by Lays Potato Chips
“Chianti…Just Do It”…. Borrowed by Nike
“Drink all that you can drink”…. Borrowed by the US Army
“Vino….it’s everywhere you want to be”…. Borrowed by Visa
“Mimosa, the breakfast of Champions”… borrowed by Wheaties cereal
So, now that I’ve used and abused almost every advertising slogan I can
think of, here’s my challenge to you. If you’re coming to the next wine
party at Brad’s on April 24th, there’s a prize for the best Website Slogan
or adaptation of an advertising slogan. Make me laugh and I’ll reward
you with alcohol.
Ian
Legal Disclaimer;
The above editorial is purely fictional and no advertising executives
were hurt in the making of this web page.
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